The War on Women was chosen by my very small book group, as our July read, we met last Wednesday to discuss it.
As one of Britain’s first video journalists Sue Lloyd-Roberts travelled the world telling stories of people from some of the world’s most dangerous and inhospitable locations. In this book she tells the uncompromising stories of many of the women she met. Sue Lloyd-Roberts was clearly a good, dedicated journalist, and this book was a labour of love for her, but sadly, Sue Lloyd-Roberts died of cancer before she could complete the book. Her daughter; Sarah Morris who also writes about her mother in a wonderful introduction – was able to complete the final chapter from notes she left behind.
The result is a searingly honest picture of the lives of women who have no say in their own destinies. It’s a pretty hopeless picture all in all and frequently horrifying. There are a couple of exceptions. The book is subtitled; and the brave ones who fight back – yet there seems few of those – I had expected more stories of women getting out, making a difference. What this book shows, is few women in the situations described, are in a position to fight back. Those that do are rather overwhelmed by the task, and unlikely to succeed in any meaningful way, though any victory however small is still a victory.
Early in the book we meet Maimouna from The Gambia, tradition dictates that she is the woman responsible for female circumcision in her village. The village rely on her for what, to them, is a vitally important ritual. However, having taken over the role from her mother, Maimouna becomes convinced that what she is doing is wrong. She leaves The Gambia for England, so she doesn’t have to perform the circumcisions any longer. She represents a small change – a change which might take generations, but it is a change.
In Argentina, Sue Lloyd-Roberts met the Grandmothers of the Plazo de Mayo, the mothers of the disappeared. Women who lost their children to the regime, young men and women and their spouses rounded up by the authorities and never seen again. Many of these young women were pregnant, kept alive until their babies were born, later the babies sold to wealthy government officials. The grandmothers fight to find those missing grandchildren, they work together, celebrate every success and fully support one another. Some may never find their missing grandchildren – but while they have breath they continue. They were my unexpected heroines.
In other chapters the view is less hopeful, in fact it is generally downright depressing. Sue Lloyd-Roberts gives voice to the women swallowed up by the vile Irish laundries, their stories are of years of incarceration, slave labour and mistreatment, sexual abuse by priests, the resulting pregnancy, punished again. It is a horrific cycle – and one that was allowed to continue for generations. Of the nuns in these places she asks:
“What is it about such women who have apparently rejected close contact with men in their private lives but who are nonetheless desperate for their approval? They carry out the orders to obey religious rules laid down by men and to punish other women into submission with unquestioning zeal. Denied real power themselves, they abuse the women under their control in a desperate attempt to win praise from the men who in turn control them.”
She ventured into the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia, where (at the time she was writing) women couldn’t drive or earn their living. She calls Saudi Arabia the world’s largest women’s prison, and it is easy to see why. Women have no right to be independent, they rely on the male members of their family for everything. Poor women trapped in their homes, wealthier women allowed to employ drivers (usually from abroad so they don’t count as men in the same way) they are driven to the huge malls, the only place outside their homes they can spend time.
In a chapter which is frequently hard to read Sue Lloyd-Roberts calls India the most dangerous place in the world to be a woman. Strong words. The instances of rape and murder against girls and women – most particularly in rural areas is unimaginable – the sheer scale took my breath away. Of course – I had been made aware of the problem through a couple of high profile cases, but I had, had no idea of the scale of it. In other chapters, highlighting the problem of forced marriage and honour killings, Sue Lloyd-Roberts reminds us how cultural traditions, so ingrained in some communities are still putting women’s lives at risk. The men who carry out these horrific murders, for instance, are unapologetic they are absolutely certain of their duty to carry out the unimaginable.
“Premeditated murder in Jordan carries the death penalty, except for men who kill female members of their family who have committed adultery or behaved in a way the male members of her family deem morally unacceptable.”
We meet the trafficked sex workers from Lithuania – a country whose separation from the old USSR has meant crippling poverty, with no state care, few jobs and young people desperate to get out and earn money to send home. Others are willing to manipulate that desperation, and young unworldly girls find themselves duped, enslaved and far from home. It is a desperate picture. So many things shocked me, but I really hadn’t considered how the UN peacekeeping forces in places like Bosnia had been largely responsible for the continuation of this horrendous trade.
“Where there are UN peacekeepers there are traffickers.”
Which left me wondering – who the hell are the good guys then?
This really isn’t an easy book to read. The stories are stories which really did need to be told, and here they are told with compassion and intelligence. I really can’t say I enjoyed the book, though I was compelled to read it – I was horrified much of the time I was reading.
I understand why Sue Lloyd-Roberts was so desperate to get this book written – to tell these stories and give voice to women with no voice. She has done them proud, so perhaps, the least we, who are so privileged can do, is read their stories and repeat them, but it’s tough going.
To say this sounds like a powerful, thought-provoking read is probably an understatement. What strikes me from your review is the combination of clear-sightedness (if that’s a word) and compassion the author has brought to this work – that’s a difficult balance to pull off effectively.
As an aside, my book group read a novel about Argentina’s disappeared last year – The Memory Stones by Caroline Brothers. While it wasn’t the group’s favourite book, it did open our eyes to the horrors those women were exposed to at the time. The impact on their relatives and those left behind was particularly hard to forget…
I think you are right, there is clear sightedness and compassion here.
The memory stones sounds fascinating, thank you for bringing it to my attention.
This sounds a very sobering book, Ali. Kudos to your book group for choosing it. I was particularly struck by Maimouna’s bravery: does Lloyd-Roberts say if she was granted asylum to stay in the UK?
Well as that chapter ended, Maimouna had had one asylum request denied and was waiting on her appeal.
We can only hope, then.
I really had my fingers crossed for her, though she had had to leave her children behind in the Gambia.
Heart-rending. It’s a useful reminder of how fortunate we are in the western world, despite the current depressing state of politics
That sounds like a shocking but necessary book to read and well done to your group for reading and sharing about it. It’s a shame there’s not much hope shown, but then that makes it more real and true, I suppose.
That was a real shame, and we all felt pretty much the same about it too. Several of us used the word hopeless as we talked about it.
Sounds like I need to make this a required read for myself. Thanks for the impactful review.
Glad you like the sound of it, let me know what you think of you do read it.
Wow, Ali – what a powerful read. I think I would have found some parts very hard to take, especially those that dig beyond the headlines we know about and reveal the real horrors. I get so angry when religious or cultural reasons are used to justify abuse of women. Although we have much to fight in the West it’s so much worse for some of our sisters around the world.
Yes, very powerful. Reading this book made me very aware that whatever inequalities and other problems we may still face in the UK for instance, women in other parts of the world have it so much worse.
Wonderful review, sounds very sobering and I’m glad someone was telling these stories.
Thank you, these are stories that very much needed telling.
This sounds an essential read. I think I’ll have to take a break between chapters though & break it up with other reading. It’s lucky for me that I can have that luxury & I’m not living such relentless, harrowing experiences.
Yes, that would be a good way to read it. I actually read the first two or three chapters like that. Setting it aside to read something else. I should have employed that method throughout the whole book.
Wow. This sounds stunning. Sad but so necessary and really like a labour of love, as you say. Too bad she didn’t see it published. I’d love to read this.
It is so sad that she didn’t live to see the book published. Glad you want to read it too.
Just ordered it. We had a discussion about this this lunch time. My friend said, he thought India might be pretty much the worst place for a woman. She seems to have come to the same conclusion.
It sounds an essential book to read. When we read of violent or underdeveloped countries, we rarely read of how much worse the situation is for women. We are lucky in this country, but even here I am involved in campaigning for equal toilet provision for women, something that should not be necessary in the 21st century. This is a minor issue compared to the abuses mentioned above, however every little victory hopefully moves thing forward.
All small victories are important. Ridiculous that you have to fight for toilet provision in this day and age.
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